Dating coach shares how to attract a truly generous partner: ‘Love should feel reciprocal’
Feeling drained in love? Relationship coach Jillian Turecki shares powerful advice for givers on finding a partner who matches your emotional energy.
Finding the right partner in today's fast-paced dating world can feel overwhelming, with swipe fatigue, mixed signals, and shallow connections often leaving people feeling stuck or discouraged. Relationship expert Jillian Turecki shared in her June 27 post expert tips to help you attract a meaningful connection and build a relationship that truly fits you. (Also read: Swipe, match, burnout: How to recognise dating fatigue and what you can do to overcome it )
Are you giving too much without realising it?
"Many givers feel drained in their relationships, like they're carrying the emotional load alone. But here's the deeper layer: we are all 'takers' sometimes, especially when we're tired, anxious, or afraid. And that's hard to admit, but necessary," Jillian wrote in her caption. “What matters is whether you're willing to see it. To examine how your own fears or needs might be silently reinforcing the very imbalance you resent.”
She continues, "This isn't about blame, it's about integrity, self-awareness, and emotional maturity. And yes, there will be seasons where one of you gives more because love will never be perfectly symmetrical. Life is uneven. But over time, the energy should feel reciprocal, and generosity must flow both ways. Find another giver to love."
Look for emotional generosity, not perfection
{{/usCountry}}She continues, "This isn't about blame, it's about integrity, self-awareness, and emotional maturity. And yes, there will be seasons where one of you gives more because love will never be perfectly symmetrical. Life is uneven. But over time, the energy should feel reciprocal, and generosity must flow both ways. Find another giver to love."
Look for emotional generosity, not perfection
{{/usCountry}}Jillian emphasises the importance of seeking a partner who gives not out of obligation but because it's part of their nature. "Find a partner who is a giver. Someone who gives because it's who they are. Someone who doesn't keep score. Be that partner, too."
{{/usCountry}}Jillian emphasises the importance of seeking a partner who gives not out of obligation but because it's part of their nature. "Find a partner who is a giver. Someone who gives because it's who they are. Someone who doesn't keep score. Be that partner, too."
{{/usCountry}}Speaking directly to sensitive and empathetic individuals, she adds, "Don't change. These are beautiful qualities, and they give you strong character. Just learn how to balance them with boundaries. Learn how to give to yourself, understand that you're deserving of the love you give to others, and stop over-giving out of fear of abandonment."
True love is relational, not transactional
{{/usCountry}}Speaking directly to sensitive and empathetic individuals, she adds, "Don't change. These are beautiful qualities, and they give you strong character. Just learn how to balance them with boundaries. Learn how to give to yourself, understand that you're deserving of the love you give to others, and stop over-giving out of fear of abandonment."
True love is relational, not transactional
{{/usCountry}}She explains, "You give not because they gave first. You give because that's who you are. Because that's the emotional state you've chosen to live in. Because your love isn't based on their behaviour, it's based on your values. You don't keep score."
According to Jillian, we should choose a partner who understands that love isn't transactional, it's relational. "A real connection isn't just about being loved, it's about being loving. It's about giving without resentment, receiving without guilt, and building a connection where generosity flows both ways." She closes with a powerful reminder, "If you're a giver, find another giver to love."
Note to readers: This article is for informational purposes only and not a substitute for professional advice.
